progression

Her cheeks flushed as if of a fever, there was a tremble in her movement, and a striking, no, an abrupt feeling in her heart. Like a pulse, the feeling reoccured over and over again. Was she nervous? Were the sounds around her too overwhelming to bear? She began to wonder if she was a strong enough person to handle something as simple as being in the presence of people she didn't know. The public, people who most likely mean nothing at all to her in the future. If she couldn't overcome this engulfing feeling in the presence of these people than how could she ever be a capable of silencing it in the presence of peope who could quite possibly determine the direction of her whole life.
She sat, pensive, the morning had brought her such great pleasure in a thrilling moment where she had no control of her surroundings. She both feared it and loved it. She wouldn't describe it as pleasure, but more of an exhilerating feeling of fear that she would most likely never forget. Not wanting to focus on the people around her, she endulged herself in this memory hoping that would make the feeling she was feeling now more bearable since that feeling was so close to this one. Then, she realized that earlier she had blamed that feeling on the lack of melodies in her ear for covering them up. It was as if an electronic device could shield her from the things she feared the most, sitting in this place right now proved her wrong because there was music playing and it didn't sooth her at all. If anything it made her nerves run more savagely.